Saturday, February 7, 2009

Great New Food With Negative Calories

I was reading this post by Fractured Toy and it inspired this post:

Did you know that free food has zero calories? If you friends buy it for you: 0. If your parents buy it for you: 0. If is buy one get one free: 0.

And and and and if they give it to you to sample at Sam's Club it has negative calories.

I somehow cannot pass up free food. It calls my name!! I cannot do it. No matter what it is. Even if I don't like it!! I once sampled a raspberry cheesecake knowing that I was allergic and I would be broke out in hives by morning.

"Hello ma'am, would you like to sample the Goodyear tire covered in cheese?"

"Why yes, I think I would."

P.S. Yes, I know everything tastes better covered in cheddar but a tire? Come on!! I was making a point :)

P.S.S. Was the title to this blog mean? Did you think I had discovered a new negative calorie food? If so, I am sincerely sorry!!

P.S.S. Celery really does have negative calories. The Food Detective on Food Network told me so.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

:) That is hysterical!
That's funny because I don't do the free food in store. I prefer to take advantage of free stuff in my home. Under the veil of anonymity.

Oh I can't believe you ate the cheesecake knowing of your allergy. Is there no end to other peoples insanity?

Do you do the free condiment thing also? If you ask them for additional syrup, Cracker Barrel has really cute jars AT NO ADDITIONAL COST. I always take the leftover biscuits out front to feed the birds.