Mama Bear

Let me start this post by saying a little disclaimer. I love my parents. Very much. Can you hear the "but" in my voice. But I was raised in a way I don't feel is right for my parenting style. My parents used fear and guilt to keep us in line. I don't want my son to fear me. I want him to know that I love him unconditionally and that I am always trying to find the best in him. I want to be a "yes" parent. That leads me to say this. I often wondered if this came up how I would speak on it. I questioned whether direct and firm would be best or nicely and calmly would do the trick. I was given the opportunity to find out my reaction. Let me just say that no hand was raised and noone was harmed but I found out quickly how I reacted. The mama bear voice unfurled inside me. How did I voice my opinion? Loud and clear.

And it turns out that that was the best approach. I feel at peace about it and my opinion is known and my parenting style is no longer a question.

"He's so spoiled"

MB has this new thing that he does. He squeals at the top of his little lungs, an awful scream. We all run into his room and peak over the side of the crib and he GRINS! He seem to find it most enjoyable that we answer his every call.

I have read some about babies online and have discovered that I am an "Attached Parent." The most important part of that for me is that whenever my baby cries I attend to him. I do not practice CIO. I do whatever it takes to make him comfortable and do not expect him to be an adult and not need me at night. I don't expect him to sleep through the night but I am glad when he does. If he cries at night "just" to be comforted I consider that a real need and not him being manipulative or spoiled. I let him sleep with me on occasion but he really likes to sleep on his own. I wear him in a wrap from loveyduds.com. I breastfeed him and would exclusively if that were an option for us. I have pretty much changed my life to put his needs above mine. I have read studies online that state a baby who's parents are attached grows up to be a more confident and independent adult. I have been told by numerous people that I am spoiling him but I will just deal with it if I am.

I cannot tell you if his nature now is because of this or just his personality but he is a dream baby. He sleeps well for the most part. He cries to be in his swing or baby bed. He loves to play on his own. He will let just about anyone hold him although he does seem to prefer me. He doesn't seem to be a "needy" baby at all.

I do not mean for this to be a controversial post so please don't take it that way, I just mean to explain some of the reasons why I parent as I do.